Hope for Eternal Life

There is always a part of the human heart which desires to have paradise now on earth. To those who read the Holy Scriptures thousands of years after they were written, it seems obvious that the Kingdom of Heaven spoken of in the Gospel was not a more glorious reign of a King David with great command over all temporal affairs and the respect of the nations given to Israel. However, this was not necessarily obvious to the Apostles. We know this because even after the Resurrection of Christ in the Acts we see them say to our Resurrected Lord: 

"They therefore who were come together, asked him, saying: Lord, wilt thou at this time restore again the kingdom to Israel?" Acts 1:6

Our Lord redirects the Apostles hopes not unto such things, but unto the hope of receiving gifts of the Spirit. I wanted to do a follow up article on this subject after reading some comments left on my brothers Boniface's article Five Unlikely Scenarios. 

We must at some point come to the realization that at no point either now or in the near future will this life cease to be a valley of tears. That all of us must first pass through death and judgement before dwelling in continual peace in the City of God which is Heaven to come. In the Rule of St. Benedict and the Rule of the Poor Knights it is put quite well when it says that we are to "Long for eternal life with all of your soul".

It is good to long for reform in the Church, so that institutionally the Church might be a faithful bride of Christ. It is good to hope for the reunification of the Church from schism, or that temporal leaders might be defenders of the Church.

But these hopes must be put in the proper place. It is an error to believe that before the last day God will systemically end all abuses, confusion, political persecution and so forth. Every day children are born into this world, made in the image of God, but nevertheless under the dominion of the devil. Even those that are baptized still suffer under the yoke of Original Sin, and will fall and sin throughout their life. God will always allow his Saints to be chastised and tried because He loves them, and   "And all that will live godly in Christ Jesus, shall suffer persecution." 2 Timothy 3:2

Even the people who lived during the 13th century - the supposed "golden age" of the Church - believed their own times were so bad and corrupt that they were living in the end times.  

If God allows abuses now in the Wisdom of His Providence, how dare any of us say that at some future point He will end all of those things before the Final Day!. We should rather believe that the reason why we have these crosses are to our benefit and that they may even be necessary for our salvation right now. There is another sin against hope seldom spoken of, but you will find in moral theology manuals, and that is the sin of aversion. Aversion is not the hatred of God but the preference of this life to the next. Yes, this world is a cross. Enduring poor liturgy is a cross. Enduring persecution for believing right belief in the Church is a cross. Enduring a hostile secular political order is a cross. Enduring tortured theology heavily influenced by humanism is a cross.

It is a real danger if we desire relief from these problems simply on account of the personal anguish they cause us because we seek peace and comfort in this life and despise the suffering that these things cause us to endure. It is through the bearing of these modern crosses that we merit Grace, that sinners are sanctified in patience, and which can help us yearn for Eternal life with all of our souls. We don't want to fall into the snare in our spiritual life of praying and hoping mainly for a good temporal order, or for that matter even allowing our peace to be destroyed because these things must be endured.

True Christian Hope is not that God will deliver us from these afflictions, but that God will give us to the grace to bear them well and persevere in His Grace until the very end of our lives, forgive us our sins and grant us eternal life. 

I would encourage you my brothers to view all of these temporal burdens as crosses and to let them help you long for death and eternal life. 

That you pray with sincerity for our leaders, especially the Church.

That you strive with all of your strength to Worship God with the proper reverence due to Him, and that the pious reception of the sacraments bears fruit in the life of the Church.

That you come to great wisdom through the humble studying of the Holy Faith, and you pass on the faith of the Fathers to those who are entrusted to you. 

That you are more so busy about laboring for your salvation and praying for those Gifts of Grace that can help you obtain it, than about pleading with God for a period of temporal peace brought on by the consecration of Russia.  

That you, with vigilant watchfulness, are eager for the salvation of the friends and enemies near to you and execute your civic duties with the love and piety fitting of a Catholic, not eagerly looking for a Monarch whom in the end could only institute a temporal order, not give people the gift of repentance that only comes from above.

May God bless us all.

Five Unlikely Scenarios

One thing that has really interested me over the years is that Catholics have very differing views on how things will play out in the future.

The future is a very illusory thing. It is often invoked as a solution to all our problems, even as the past is castigated as their source. When faced with the break down of the liturgy, or the nonsense coming out of Rome, it is comforting to think, "It won't be this way forever. Someday a future pope or council will fix all this. God won't abandon us."

And no doubt, He won't. There will be periods of reform. The Church always reforms herself. And we know from divine revelation that the Church wins in the end. This is why I am not a total skeptic about the problems in the Catholic world - why I do not give in to ultimate despair. Essentially, why I continue to be Catholic. I know how this story ends. We all do. Christ and His Church will triumph.

But over the years I have listened to a lot of Catholics talk about what this triumph looks like, and I have realized that it is drastically different for people. For example, I personally believe the Church will triumph in the end, but I have never assumed that this triumph will take the form of some kind of general social restoration. Other Catholics see it differently; they see the vindication of the Church as essentially bound up with a kind of restoration, not only of the Church's social influence but of her ancient rites and customs as well.

I have always been a kind of pessimist in this regard. I have never assumed any future pope or council will totally undo everything. At best, I have held out hope that they would mitigate some of the more serious problems. I do believe in the future there will be a shift back towards tradition within the Church; what that shift looks like, I could not say.

Don't mistake me - I would like a total restoration, but I just don't see it as feasible in light of history and where we are going. But my essential view of the future is it gets worse and worse and worse until the world burns. God's grace may spare us certain calamities, but not all. The wheat has to be sorted from the chaff before the end, and this process is unstoppable. This is just my opinion, so I grant I could be totally wrong about it.

In this post, I am examining five scenarios I have heard bandied about by Catholics who hope the future is going to be better. In each case, I think the proposed scenario is much too overly optimistic and vain to pin ones hopes on. I then will present two alternative scenarios which I find more realistic.

1. A Future Pope Will Condemn Pope Francis

What some vainly imagine will happen: Many Catholics are extremely confident that some future traditional pope will call out and condemn the most egregious acts and statement of Pope Francis; extreme variants have this future pope condemning the acts of pretty much the entire post-Conciliar papal Magisterium. Some envision an ecumenical Council formally condemning the acts of the modern popes.

What could possibly happen: If there is a shift back towards tradition, it is conceivable that a future pope will issue decrees that call out some of the problematic statements in previous papal teaching and issue documents with the specific aim of correcting these previous problems. Benedict XVI once said Nostra Aetate was a weak document, and also complained that Gaudium et Spes was too uncritical in its acceptance of modern progressivism. Of course, Benedict was referring to conciliar documents, not papal teaching; and Benedict, despite these criticisms, never did anything to correct the imbalances he noted. It is conceivable, however, that a future pope might call out the errors in the documents of Francis or other post-Conciliar popes and actually issue documents meant to balance them out or correct them.

What is most likely to happen: People who bank on either of the two above scenarios happening don't understand how bureaucracies work. When a new chief comes in to assume control of a bureaucracy, he has to be able to manage and work with the bureaucracy, otherwise he can't get anything done. To accomplish that, there is a strong sense that his own legitimacy depends upon showing a continuity with what has come before him. A new leader wants to appropriate the strength and momentum of the bureaucracy, and to do that he has to be able to show, in some ways, that nothing has changed - that differences are just a matter of style or emphasis. A leader of a bureaucracy is very hesitant to openly contradict or overturn what a predecessor has done because he does not want to undermine the strength of the very office he holds. And he does not want to create a precedent that may lead to his actions being overturned in the future. This is why the most likely scenario is that the problematic statements of Pope Francis will simply never be addressed. They may not be quoted or cited in future sources of doctrine, but they will not be repudiated or corrected. The Magisterium of the future will simply put their hands in their pockets and hum and skip along like the Franciscan pontificate never happened. Future theologians will be left to puzzle out how (or if) Francis' teaching has a permanent place in the deposit of faith while the Church's highest theological authorities will be deafeningly silent on the matter. But no pope is going to want to openly overturn anything done by a previous pope; he will feel like he is undermining his own authority.

2. The Novus Ordo will be Abolished

What some vainly imagine will happen: The abolition of the Novus Ordo is the perennial wet dream of traditionalists. And rightfully so! So much of the destruction of the Catholic faith in the past fifty years has been bound up with the new liturgy. In most trad fantasies, the Church suddenly comes to its senses. Prompted by the Holy Spirit, the zealously traditional future pontiff and episcopate will scrap the Novus Ordo entirely and implement a return to the Traditional Latin Mass throughout the Latin rite. Possible variants include the Novus Ordo being declared heretical or invalid.

What could possibly happen: The vision of Pope Benedict XVI was that the two "forms" of the Roman rite should "mutually enrich" each other, a view Cardinal Sarah has recently endorsed in a plan he called "liturgical reconciliation." If the traditional movement continues to gain steam, it is possible that the traditional rite begins to "enrich" the Novus Ordo. We may see future tinkering with the Novus Ordo to bring it back more to something like what the Council Fathers intended. It is possible that a restoration of Gregorian chant sees the Church's historical music actually taking pride of place, as Sacrosanctum Concilium envisioned. We could see some of the options of the Novus Ordo removed, for example, some of the Eucharistic canons, or the celebration ad orientem made mandatory, or communion kneeling on the tongue become more or less universal again. Of course, this also means the Traditional Latin Mass may also have to suffer "enrichment" from the Novus Ordo, which is a major (and valid) complaint against Cardinal Sarah's opinion. Although, if we were in a situation where the traditional Mass was popular enough to start to really influence the Novus Ordo, it is unlikely that the worst elements of the Novus Ordo would be injected into the Extraordinary Form. It is possible that over time - and I am talking a century - the Novus Ordo could blend into something that looked and felt quite similar to the Extraordinary Form in its externals but of course retained the essential structure and lectionary of the New Mass.

What is most likely to happen: Neither the abolition of the Novus Ordo nor the transformation of the Novus Ordo into a quasi-Extraordinary Form entity are extremely likely. What is more likely is that the Novus Ordo will simply continue on as it always has. It will bend a little here and there based on the whims of the current pontiff. Under Benedict it grew more traditional in some places; under Francis anything goes again. But it will essentially remain unchanged. However, the Traditional Latin Mass will continue to gain traction. Unless Summorum Pontificum is positively abrogated, it is likely to continue to attract the youth. We will see a kind of cross fading between the two forms - as conventional Novus Ordo parishes continue to decline (in some cases precipitously), offerings of the Traditional Latin Mass will increase. Eventually we may have a situation globally akin to what we now see in France, where there is a thriving traditional movement existing side-by-side with a moribund, dying Novus Ordo establishment. But I don't see the Novus Ordo ever formally being abolished. The Novus Ordo is here to stay.

3. Vatican II Will Be Overturned

What some vainly imagine will happen: At some future date, another solemn Ecumenical Council will be held in which the documents of Vatican II will be completely nullified or abrogated. This is theoretically possible (it is argued) since none of these documents make binding theological definitions. In some scenarios, it is actually imagined that Vatican II will be declared no true Ecumenical Council at all. The documents of Vatican II will be publicly and entirely repudiated and possibly condemned as formally heretical.

What could possibly happen: If there is a future shift back towards tradition, clarifying documents could be issued that interpret the documents of Vatican II in the most traditional light possible. This sort of thing happened in 2007 when the Congregation for the Doctrine of the Faith issued an brief interpretive document on the phrase subsistit in in Lumen Gentium, directing that this teaching should be interpreted in continuity with the traditional understanding that the Catholic Church is the true Church of Christ. Athanasius Schneider has called for a similar authoritative interpretation of various aspects of the Council. If the Church hierarchy globally should ever begin to shift in a more traditional orientation, we could possibly see more clarifications of this sort that attempt to bring harmony between tradition and Vatican II (Related: What is the Hermeneutic of Continuity?).

What is most likely to happen: Like it or not, most Catholic prelates, even conservative ones, do not think there is any fundamental problem with the documents of Vatican II. Most hold the theory of the "hijacked council", or a version of "good council-bad implementation." What will most likely happen with the documents of Vatican II is...nothing at all. We could potentially see a few key phrases of teachings from the Council find their way into the perennial sources of faith. Perhaps Gaudium et Spes comment that without the Creator, the creature becomes incomprehensible; perhaps some of the ecclesiological statements of Lumen Gentium. Possibly a statement from Dei Verbum. But really, besides the two Constitutions, much of the conciliar corpus is unmemorable. As has occurred in the past with other ecumenical councils, a few kernels will be repeated and remembered and the rest of the Council documents - with all their wordy verbosity - will fall into obscurity. That is not to say they will be abrogated; rather, they will be superseded by new documents. These documents will probably be of a slightly more traditional bent (in the same way Benedict XVI was slightly more traditional than John Paul II), but they will not evidence any truly radical departure from the essential teaching of Vatican II.

4. The Bishops in Union with the Pope Will Consecrate Russia

What some vainly imagine will happen: A future pope, moved by the message of Fatima and convinced by the calamitous state of the world, will recognize the need for a consecration of Russia specifically according to the directives of Our Lady of Fatima. The pope in union with the bishops of the world will consecrate Russia - Russia alone and specifically - and an era of peace will be ushered in, the orthodox will be reconciled, and all manner of marvelous things will happen because of obedience to Our Lady.

What could possibly happen: The above scenario is very unlikely, as it would require future popes to admit that the actions of previous popes were errant or insufficient, which is highly improbable. Also, it requires a pope who takes Fatima seriously enough to break the Vatican's ostpolitik and risk harming "diplomatic" relations with the Patriarch of Moscow, which is also a big no-no. More likely is a scenario where the previous consecrations of "the world" to Our Lady are periodically renewed. For example, I can see a 50th anniversary commemoration of John Paul II's 1984 consecration in 2034, in which "the world" is again consecrated to Mary, similar to the consecration of the world made by Pope Francis in 2013. Just as the original Jubilee Year of 1300 became something that was repeated and became institutionalized, so we may see periodic renewals of the consecration of "the world" to Mary, none of which will mention Russia but which will all somehow be done "in the spirit" of Fatima.

What is most likely to happen: Nothing at all. As time goes on, the message of Fatima will be seen more as a general, feel-good sort of vague thing; devotion to Fatima will be reduced to just "loving Mary" and will get away from anything specific. Lots of flowers. Lots of feeling good. Lots of "On This Day O' Beautiful Mother," but nothing else really. It's eschatological content will wither and be forgotten, even by conservative popes/prelates.

5. A Restoration of Global Catholic Monarchy

What some vainly imagine will happen: After some future calamity - or alternately, perhaps during an "Era of Peace" ushered in by the Fatima consecrations - there will be a massive conversion of the world to the Catholic faith and global penitence. Reinvigorated by a new found devotion to the Kingship of Christ, Catholic monarchy's will be restored throughout much of the Christian world, perhaps with a sort of restored Holy Roman Empire ruled by some crusty scion of the House of Hapsburg. The social Kingship of Christ will be totally restored.

What could possibly happen: After some future turn of events upon which we can't speculate, some areas with a high population density of Catholics could see the rise of some Catholic strong-men dictator types, rulers who are autocratic but whose power is mitigated by their Catholic piety. I am talking about people like Portugal's Salazar or Englebert Dollfuss. These will not be monarchs, however, but authoritarians whose rule would be a far cry from a true restoration of Christ's kingship. At best, they will restore the social position of the Church, at least externally, and will enact laws reflective of some aspects of Catholic social teaching. But it will be difficult for them not to slip into the characteristic pitfalls of dictatorship.

What is most likely to happen: The slide of society towards liberalism will progress unabated until the Second Coming of Christ. As time goes on, there will be no more devout Catholics in positions of authority nationally, at least not such that they can wield any real influence. There will be no general social Catholic restoration of any sort. What restoration there occurs will be in little social niches, small communities, personal networks, etc. (No, please do not spam a bunch of quotes from obscure 17th century blesseds about the Great Monarch, nor do I want to hear about Fr. Ianuzzi's books).

Anyhow, that's my take on things. I may be totally wrong. I hope I am. What do you think?

Jewels For Your Crown

I wanted to make you all aware that along with the stock market being at record high’s there also appears to be a rally of sort of available wealth for the kingdom of heaven.  I would have preferred to describe it as a lottery ticket, mainly because lottery winnings are often time quickly squandered away, however winning the lottery is a rare thing, while the opportunity of obtaining this jewel for your crown in the kingdom is most common.

Humanity, especially in the west is moving farther away from Christ, which in consequence means many more souls are being lost.  What is needed to reverse this course? Grace, abundant grace.  How is grace merited? By prayer and penance.  

And what about us, does not the debt we owe to God for our numerous sins grow daily? What shall we do about that?

With so much debt and so many graces needed, we are in need of great amounts of it and fast.

We can obtain this abundant grace, and merit in the kingdom by enduring wrongs patiently. With the abundance of sin today, we must confess there is a greater abundance of grace. My forecast is that the opportunity of obtaining this merit is growing daily, and will continue to grow for the foreseeable future.   Bearing wrongs patiently is probably not the most popular of the spiritual works of mercy, but it is one that all the faithful will have plenty of opportunity to practice.   Let us not squander it like a the winnings of a lotto through impatience and irritation. 

“If then He sends us suffering in this life, it is for our own good: All things work together unto good." Even chastisements come to us, not to crush us, but to make us mend our ways and save our souls:"Let us believe that these scourges of the Lord have happened for our amendment and not for our destruction."  St. Alphonsus Ligouri, Uniformity with Gods Will.

How can we know if we are bearing wrongs patiently?  Are we accepting our trials with peace, joy, longanimity, are we showing goodness to those who make us suffer?  Do we show constancy in our labors for the Church, or do we only really labor when we are stirred up in a passion of anger?

How do these test if we are bearing wrongs patiently?  What I have described are the fruits of the Holy Ghost.  If we are at least striving with our hearts and souls to characterize our actions and thoughts after this manner then we are traveling towards that patience that will fully let us possess our souls. Luke 21, 19

To learn more about the Fruits of the Holy Ghost, check out our latest audiobook: The Catechism in Examples: The Fruits of the Holy Spirit.

So lets get practical, what amongst the zealous warriors for the Kingdom of heaven can hinder a person's patience when bearing wrongs?

I believe one major cause is the displacement of seeking first the Kingdom of Heaven and the Love of Jesus Christ in ones own life with that of the outward success of the Church.

It is a mark of a saint to be grieved when Holy Mother the Church suffers evil.  A saint should grieve, weep and then rise up and rebuild the walls of the Holy City with a sword in his hand. Nehmiah 4:17

Discouragement, anxiety or even worst sins that result from bad news are signs that we have taken our eyes off of Heaven on put them here on earth.  It will help us keep our patience if we continue to remind ourselves that God is in control of everything and that He Loves us.  

So what can we do?

In this month of June, dedicated to the most Sacred Heart of our Lord Jesus Christ, we can strive manfully to practice the meekness of His Most Sacred Heart.

“" I will tell you my plan. When I see myself inclined to get angry, I pray at once to God to help me, and to make me meek ; then, with a little care and by the grace of God, the passion goes away, and my good humour comes back to me. But if sometimes it does not go away at once, and when I feel it about to burst out in angry words, I immediately stop, keep my lips closed, and do nothing till it is over ; and then, when the tempest is past, I find it easy to speak gently and act kindly.”  St Vincent DePaul, The Catechism in Examples, Fruits of the Holy Spirit, Mildness

Whatever evil afflicts us we should like valiant warriors go to fight the dragon. To bear wrongs patiently is not to run from battle, but to fight bravely with the arms that God has given us: meekness, patience, goodness and all the other Fruits of the Holy Ghost, fighting for His Glory and for the love of our neighbor, even if our neighbor is our enemy.  If we do this we shall have peace in our hearts and jewels in our crown for the kingdom of heaven.

Jesus Meek and Humble of Heart Make our hearts like unto thine

“The Virtue of Patience is the one that most assures us of perfection”.  St Francis De Sales, From the Voice of The Saints, TAN Books 1993

Reproaches and Tribulation

“And on the one hand indeed, by reproaches and tribulations, were made a gazingstock; and on the other, became companions of them that were used in such sort.”  Hebrews 10:33

This is part 2 of  a two blog posts on insolent speech

There is not a shortage of drink in the cup of bitterness today is their my friend? Perhaps if I was with you or we lived close to one another I could offer you a drink, a comfortable chair and some time to hear your woes, to shake my head at the cruelty of the approaches and insults leveled against you.  What insults? The names leveled against you: fool, pharisee, reactionary, protestant, nutter, crazy, loathsome, pharisaic, prideful etc.  The exaggerations and caricatures used to distort what you say. The suggestions of either subtle or explicit evil in all of your words.  The guilt by association used to discredit you before you even open your mouth. 

We could perhaps include the titles of rad trad, neo con, and the such like, which, are used like a brush to paint your opinions offering a sloppy and quick condemnation without even hearing or reading you.  Please my friend, suffer me not to argue with me that these titles are a just thing, my point is not to argue about the justice of the use of titles, but to point out that titles should not be used to be dismissive to silence and not consider someones words.

Charity seems to be preached from all sides, which is good, but there can seem to be a lack of good examples.  One side condemns an evil action and the the other side condemns the people who condemned the evil for condemning and then the first party condemns them etc.  Or, perhaps in weakness a soul expresses doubt, he is forthwith condemned for faithlessness.  A person, perhaps to casually lets off steam, or pleads for the attention when he has been neglected, instead of being comforted he is mocked and ridiculed and held up to scorn.

And of course as sins of the tongue and hatred is en-kindled on all sides, charity will be constantly invoked with indignation.  It seems that to their guilt, many people are truly blind to the sins of the tongue and judgement.  Lord I am blind, I wish to see!

There has been much discussion about whether we should criticize the Pope, and the Bishops. If every member of the Church is part of the body of Christ, I think it would be better to discuss how we should deal with one another. If we cannot be kind to who we sit next to in the pew or suffer them with patience we will lack the understanding on how to approach those people who are set apart.   How are people to know that we are Christs disciples? It is by the love that we show one another. John 13:35

I hope that I can offer some practical advice for how to deal with these situations when they occur, to help you suffer, or rather, to suffer together in patience.

So let us sit beside our Lord Jesus, mocked with a crown of thorns, abandoned by friends, struck with a reed, jeered at by enemies.  We will ask him in his affliction to comfort us who are so weak, who struggle to rejoice when we bear with contempt and insolence of others and teach us His wisdom.

Lets start with David, the man after Gods own heart. 1 Samuel 13:14

“Semei, the son of Gera, and coming out he cursed as he went on, And he threw stones at David, ...And thus said Semei when he cursed the king: ...And Abisai the son of Sarvia said to the king (David): Why should this dead dog curse my lord the king? I will go, and cut off his head. And the king said: What have I to do with you, ye sons of Sarvia? Let him alone and let him curse: for the Lord hath bid him curse David: and who is he that shall dare say, why hath he done so? ...let him alone that he may curse as the Lord hath bidden him. Perhaps the Lord may look upon my affliction, and the Lord may render me good for the cursing of this day.  2 Samuel 16

We see here a living faith.  God is a loving Father that counts every hair on your head, we must not think that when he allows another to injure us with words that he does not know about it. 

“Had it been an evil thing to suffer wrong God would not have enjoined it upon us.”  St John Chrysostom, Homilies from the Fathers for Lent Vol 4

Look at Davids great trust: that God will repay him good for bearing the cursing in patience. God did and Semei that mocked him when David returned had to beg for his life. 

“Hath thy neighbour wronged and grieved thee, and involved thee in a thousand ills.  Bet it so, yet do not prosecute vengeance on thine own part, lest thou be treating thy Lord with contempt! Yield the matter to God, and He will dispose of it, much better than thou canst desire.. Never canst thou so avenge thyself, as He is prepared to avenge thee, if thou givest place to Him alone.”  St John Chrysostom, The Right Use of Lent, Homilies of the Fathers for Lent Vol 4.

We must have faith that God has willed us to suffer the evil, and that he will avenge us and grant us a reward if we bear it with patience. 

So we are insulted, and that terrible fight within us comes upon us like a beast, to keep our patience to win the crown? How shall we subdue it?

“What didst thou wish? To be avenged. Hast thou forgotten that when He was being crucified, He said, "Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do?"  He who is asleep in thy heart did not wish to be avenged.”  St Augustine, Christ Asleep, Homilies of the Fathers for Lent Vol 4

The remembrance of our Lord being crucified and His love for his enemies shall be our weapon  against our own wrath.  We will awake him, we will call on the name of the Lord, we will repeat those words “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do!”

And yet our hearts are still troubled: We see that God has willed it, and that we can obtain a great crown through patience, we have recalled the patience of Christ and remembered his passion, but the cruelty of the words cut deep!

Wait… Let us consider the cruelty of the remarks.  

"When you hear anyone spoken ill of, make the accusation doubtful if you can do so justly.  If you cannot, excuse the intention of the accused party.  If that cannot be done, express sympathy for him [and] change the subject of the conversation"  St Francis De Sales, Introduction to the Devout Life pg 205

Can we see if perhaps the words were meant to injure, or that the person meant good but failed to deliver? No? Is the person perhaps to be pitied in some way and that in the poor circumstances of the sorrows of there life they just lashed out?  I give you these considerations from the Doctor of Charity to continue in our fight.

Not enough yet?

Despite all of these things you still feel overcome and filled with rage.  

“It is not said merely, forgo wrath, but retain it not in thy mind; think not on it, part with all thy resentment...thou art tormenting thyself and setting up rage as an executioner within thee in every part.”  St John Chrysostom

Our suffering is real, what shall we do?

I say change the conversation with your own heart: go out to dinner, have a beer, go fishing, look at your favorite picture,  hold the evil remarks of others with contempt, look not on the remark, think not on the remark. A weed without water, light or warmth will die, so too will the insolent remarks fade from us if we put them out from our mind.  Wounds heal better when they are not licked.  

One day God willing my friends you and I will obtain to that perfection that suffers. Nay prefers insults and contempt! To suffer all things for Christ sake for: “Blessed are ye when they shall revile you, and persecute you, and speak all that is evil against you, untruly, for my sake: Be glad and rejoice, for your reward is very great in heaven.” Matt 5 11-12

Amen. So may it be.